http://ezinearticles.com/?cat=Arts-and-Entertainment:Humor EzineArticles.com - Trusted By Millions as The Source For Quality Original Articles http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/ This is a story about a milestone birthday that didn't turn out as planned. A little dark in the middle, but alls well that ends well. Fri, 09 May 2008 13:21:00 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?One-Fine-Day&id=1157822 http://ezinearticles.com/?One-Fine-Day&id=1157822 Cleaning the garage. It's a nasty job, but someone has to do it and if it's you, you might as well have some fun with it. Here's how. Fri, 09 May 2008 11:25:02 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?How-To-Clean-Your-Garage-and-Live-To-Tell-About-It&id=1165022 http://ezinearticles.com/?How-To-Clean-Your-Garage-and-Live-To-Tell-About-It&id=1165022 It was 9:30 in the evening when my stomach began to growl and complain of emptiness. There's a Subway Sandwich Shop on the corner of our street, and the cool nights here in Arizona make it an enjoyable ten minute stroll. I never walk fast, but my stride is smooth as yogurt without the fruit. Fri, 09 May 2008 11:02:56 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?I-Should-Have-Gone-To-Bed&id=1157054 http://ezinearticles.com/?I-Should-Have-Gone-To-Bed&id=1157054 A funny account of a new Big Rig driver's experiences on his first trip into The Big Apple. Sit in the right seat of a big truck while Traveler takes you on an adventure into the heart of the Bronx in a semi tractor and 53-foot trailer! Lots of laughs Fri, 09 May 2008 09:23:04 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Once-Upon-a-Time-(Part-One)-And-Safely-Out-of-the-Frying-Pan-and-Into-the-Fire-(Part-Two)&id=1132016 http://ezinearticles.com/?Once-Upon-a-Time-(Part-One)-And-Safely-Out-of-the-Frying-Pan-and-Into-the-Fire-(Part-Two)&id=1132016 Kelly pokes fun at the TV commercial moms in her hilarious weekly column, Staying on the funny side. Come laugh and relate to her antics of real mom versus TV mom. Thu, 08 May 2008 14:20:22 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Staying-On-The-Funny-Side-Of-Commercials&id=1158297 http://ezinearticles.com/?Staying-On-The-Funny-Side-Of-Commercials&id=1158297 Here I am again, ready to take the plunge. Now that I'm back though, what do I have to say? Has there been months of pent up creativity, just waiting to burst out of my idea filled brain? or will it turn out (as i fully expect) that only the tiniest germ, has been lying, undisturbed and probably unperturbed, by the notion of being put into print. Wed, 07 May 2008 11:10:56 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?My-Talent&id=1150862 http://ezinearticles.com/?My-Talent&id=1150862 I am tired of filling the ice cube trays. Every tray I examine has just two ice cubes remaining. It is as if the perpetrator of this outrage, and she knows who she is, decides that as long there are two cubes left, it would be wasteful to fill the tray. One cube, apparently, can be sacrificed. Fri, 02 May 2008 13:05:15 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Ice-Cubes&id=1142617 http://ezinearticles.com/?Ice-Cubes&id=1142617 Katie is my wife. I married her with in a week, fell in love and now I am her husband. These seven days are full of events of meaningful consequences, are they really? Thu, 01 May 2008 16:55:50 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?A-Love-Story-Which-Ended-In-Marriage&id=1141808 http://ezinearticles.com/?A-Love-Story-Which-Ended-In-Marriage&id=1141808 A humorous look at the origin and development of alarms. Clocks and their alarms have a long association with humans, and animals too have their systems. Thu, 01 May 2008 16:46:55 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Alarms-and-Clocks&id=1141965 http://ezinearticles.com/?Alarms-and-Clocks&id=1141965 Arrgghhh, it's that dreaded time again... HALF TERM! If I have to listen to Poooower Raaaangers SPD, Pooooower Raaangers to the rescue, break up Triple H and The Undertaker wrestling on my floor or tend to WWE/Raw carpet burns one more time, I'm gonna perform a couple of double choke slams of my own! As you can tell, I'm not in the best of moods. It's not all the kids' fault though. Some of it is self-inflicted... Thu, 01 May 2008 16:10:00 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Jangling-Nerves-Not-Conducive-to-Productivity&id=1139052 http://ezinearticles.com/?Jangling-Nerves-Not-Conducive-to-Productivity&id=1139052 Are you having hard time getting a smile on your worried face in this busy life? Just relax and watch a funny videos online. Thu, 01 May 2008 11:51:37 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Are-You-Looking-For-Funny-Videos-And-Commercials?&id=1142210 http://ezinearticles.com/?Are-You-Looking-For-Funny-Videos-And-Commercials?&id=1142210 The use of bumper stickers to get someone's point across to those driving behind him has been a major advertising medium for all kinds of controversial topics for a very long time. Sometimes, the best way to get your message across quickly can be done better with a little twist of humor. Thu, 01 May 2008 11:44:58 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Using-Funny-Bumper-Stickers-To-Get-Your-Point-Across&id=1138648 http://ezinearticles.com/?Using-Funny-Bumper-Stickers-To-Get-Your-Point-Across&id=1138648 The growth of alternative comedy nights has been uncharacteristically fast for the entertainment industry. Since the year 2000, the number of venues running comedy clubs in London alone has increased from approximately 25 to over 100. So what lead to this growth? Have the comedians change their material, or have audience reactions and attitudes to alternative comedy changed? Thu, 01 May 2008 10:07:04 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Does-Alternative-Comedy-Have-Mainstream-Appeal?&id=1133739 http://ezinearticles.com/?Does-Alternative-Comedy-Have-Mainstream-Appeal?&id=1133739 I'm not speaking to Rachel Ray. She broke my heart. Find out how in this tearful account. Wed, 30 Apr 2008 15:12:05 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Day-I-Broke-Up-With-Rachel-Ray&id=1145037 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Day-I-Broke-Up-With-Rachel-Ray&id=1145037 25 pairs of beaver were taken to Argentina by someone interested in fur farming. They were under the radar of the local predators and there are now over 200,000 of them in the wild. (Enthusiastic bunch.) Wed, 30 Apr 2008 08:22:39 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Beaver-in-Argentina&id=1132898 http://ezinearticles.com/?Beaver-in-Argentina&id=1132898 DANCING WITH THE STARS The Professor was mad at me. We had agreed to meet at 8 pm to sign an important agreement. My delay led to postponement of the meeting. Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:41:29 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Dancing-with-the-Stars&id=1142853 http://ezinearticles.com/?Dancing-with-the-Stars&id=1142853 Let's face it. We all love the Internet and its wealth of quick knowledge and information but it has also caused us all our fair share of misery. Viruses have destroyed our hard drives, financial and sexual predators lay lurking in the shadows and everything else that could possibly be unpleasant is never more than a click of the mouse away. Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:33:48 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughing-Out-Loud-Online-The-Key-To-Finding-Hilarity-In-A-Boring-World&id=1139182 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughing-Out-Loud-Online-The-Key-To-Finding-Hilarity-In-A-Boring-World&id=1139182 Being an entertainer for all of my life, I have been driving for many years all over this great country and I have noticed that drivers of certain states have definite traits of their own that is individualistic to themselves. For example, everyone knows that in Florida the people drive extremely slow. That is their very own characteristic while New Yorkers drive like they are in a race. Mon, 28 Apr 2008 10:55:27 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Driving-In-New-Jersey&id=1122756 http://ezinearticles.com/?Driving-In-New-Jersey&id=1122756 Kelly's hilarious weekly column Staying on the Funny Side. This week's topic: Spiritual Sightings. Nester sees Jesus on the side of his garage. Fri, 25 Apr 2008 15:41:51 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Staying-On-The-Funny-Side-Of-Spiritual-Sightings&id=1130271 http://ezinearticles.com/?Staying-On-The-Funny-Side-Of-Spiritual-Sightings&id=1130271 Check out some of the essential elements to create a successful funny video. Once a video strikes cord with its target audience, it is bound be virally carried across the online world. Fri, 25 Apr 2008 13:32:26 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Key-Ingredients-to-Cool-Funny-Videos&id=1128614 http://ezinearticles.com/?Key-Ingredients-to-Cool-Funny-Videos&id=1128614 With a vast number of funny pictures and videos available on the Internet, people can now have access to some of the quickest ways to pure fun. Stress busters apart, these funny stuffs have great therapeutic uses as well. Fri, 25 Apr 2008 13:31:18 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Spice-Up-Your-Lives-With-Online-Peppy-Humors&id=1128598 http://ezinearticles.com/?Spice-Up-Your-Lives-With-Online-Peppy-Humors&id=1128598 Are you looking for that someone special? Well, your initial approach can make or break your chances. Here are ten opening lines that you really should avoid. Fri, 25 Apr 2008 10:19:22 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Worst-Pick-Up-Lines-Ever&id=1134018 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Worst-Pick-Up-Lines-Ever&id=1134018 It started very simply for one well-known comedian. He was out with nothing to do one day and decided to buy a book. The subject of the book was how to write books, and the result changed his life. Wed, 23 Apr 2008 15:40:39 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Joke-Writing-How-Can-I-Learn-To-Write-Jokes&id=1128901 http://ezinearticles.com/?Joke-Writing-How-Can-I-Learn-To-Write-Jokes&id=1128901 Ahhh... Remember these times? I do. Actually, I hope you don't! ;o) Wed, 23 Apr 2008 14:50:52 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Date&id=1120365 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Date&id=1120365 Generating wild and wacky news stories may not be in a lorry driver's job description, but it seems to be one of their talents. Here is another set of hilarious lorry stories which will make you laugh out loud. Wed, 23 Apr 2008 12:01:30 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-More-Silly-Lorry-Stories!&id=1128666 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-More-Silly-Lorry-Stories!&id=1128666 Undoubtedly Eckhart Tolle and Oprah are quite spiritual. Their online web class has awakened the world and gladly so, taking many of us beyond our head and into our heart. The spirit within truly needs more recognition and liberation from our egoic thought processes. But here's some food for thought and thought provoking questions for the dynamic duo. Just some questions sent to Oprah and Eckhart online that never got answered. Tue, 22 Apr 2008 18:23:08 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Deep-and-Funny-Questions-for-Eckhart-Tolle-and-Oprah-about-A-New-Earth-Spiritual-Mysteries-and-Mantras&id=1116826 http://ezinearticles.com/?Deep-and-Funny-Questions-for-Eckhart-Tolle-and-Oprah-about-A-New-Earth-Spiritual-Mysteries-and-Mantras&id=1116826 Humor that is used appropriately can be your best friend or your worst enemy if misused, don't you agree? While positive humor has tremendous power to heal and create closeness; negative humor has tremendous power to hurt and distance. How do you define what a "healthy" sense of humor IS and IS NOT? Tue, 22 Apr 2008 11:59:10 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Reasons-Why-Your-Sense-of-Humor-is-No-Laughing-Matter-Helpful-or-Harmful-Humor&id=1125320 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Reasons-Why-Your-Sense-of-Humor-is-No-Laughing-Matter-Helpful-or-Harmful-Humor&id=1125320 What could have tarnished the memory of our dream vacation, over time, has provided us with many laughs as we retell the story. When you find yourself dealing with disappointments on your vacation, tell yourself, "Someday we will laugh about this." And you will. Tue, 22 Apr 2008 11:54:11 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughter-Your-Remedy-for-Distress-Finding-Amusement-Amongst-Misfortune&id=1125227 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughter-Your-Remedy-for-Distress-Finding-Amusement-Amongst-Misfortune&id=1125227 GOOD NEWS! University of Chicago studies show a great sense of humor can add an additional 8 years to your life! How do you know if you have a great sense of humor, or not? Take a few minutes right now to evaluate some of your present humor habits. Tue, 22 Apr 2008 11:52:22 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?What-If-You-Could-Add-An-Additional-8-Years-To-Your-life?-Assessing-Your-Sense-of-Humor&id=1125221 http://ezinearticles.com/?What-If-You-Could-Add-An-Additional-8-Years-To-Your-life?-Assessing-Your-Sense-of-Humor&id=1125221 At last an answer to that long-pondered mystery - why do we wear our socks with the lumpy, scratchy seams on the inside? Find out now! Fri, 18 Apr 2008 16:15:49 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Joy-of-Socks&id=1112637 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Joy-of-Socks&id=1112637 You must be wondering from where do some people get such funny images. Well, it's very easy and simple to find them, as they are very much available on the Internet. Fri, 18 Apr 2008 13:12:05 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Tips-For-Finding-Funny-Pictures-Online&id=1114166 http://ezinearticles.com/?Tips-For-Finding-Funny-Pictures-Online&id=1114166 Do you believe in UFOs? My sister, Peggy, and I do. Fri, 18 Apr 2008 10:06:19 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Flying-Saucers&id=1111246 http://ezinearticles.com/?Flying-Saucers&id=1111246 Humor is always linked to comedy. It is generally recognized as something acceptable to, and enjoyed by everyone, no matter what his or her age. Learning to smile is one of the first recognizable displayed characteristics of newborn babies. The rhythmic expulsion of air from the lungs is recognized as laughter in a matter of weeks following the birth, and is a primitive form of basic communication. Mother Nature has already equipped young babies with a powerful tool they can use to good advantage as a key factor in human bonding, the building of special relationships and social cohesion in the years that follow. Fri, 18 Apr 2008 09:28:52 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Humor-What-Is-It?&id=1118624 http://ezinearticles.com/?Humor-What-Is-It?&id=1118624 Even though I am a writer in the twenty first century with a laptop and Microsoft Word and all the other gadgets and geegaws I still sit down with a blank piece of paper and a pen or pencil when an idea is starting to form in my head. I guess it's conditioning from all those years in school when I was sitting behind a desk trying to express myself with a pen or pencil. I can still picture the scene, thirty kids leaning over their desks, straining to form those letters with big fat pencils clutched in their hands, and a few of them even let the tip of their tongues slip out the corner of their mouths, the ultimate sign of concentration. Thu, 17 Apr 2008 16:19:47 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Fat-Pencil-Days&id=1114246 http://ezinearticles.com/?Fat-Pencil-Days&id=1114246 It's almost dragon breeding season and soon your local animal shelters will be offering these poor homeless fire-breathing creatures (and their cute hatchlings) to unsuspecting customers. Be aware, the majority of dragons adopted from shelters are returned. Thu, 17 Apr 2008 15:47:08 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Top-Ten-Reasons-Why-You-Shouldnt-Own-A-Dragon-As-A-Pet&id=1110649 http://ezinearticles.com/?Top-Ten-Reasons-Why-You-Shouldnt-Own-A-Dragon-As-A-Pet&id=1110649 It's time to tell the presidential frontrunners about these two underrated and unnoticed illnesses. It's up to you to pass the word. Thu, 17 Apr 2008 15:22:58 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?What-The-Health-Is-Going-On?&id=1116617 http://ezinearticles.com/?What-The-Health-Is-Going-On?&id=1116617 When I was sixteen years old and had my first cosmetic surgery, the thought of this did not alarm me one bit. I did not worry about the surgery itself, no concerns about being put to sleep nor the pain.. Thu, 17 Apr 2008 14:48:40 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Fear-of-Surgery&id=1109065 http://ezinearticles.com/?Fear-of-Surgery&id=1109065 How many times have you been to Target or K-mart or even the grocery store and seen the 2 for 1 sale? Always looks appealing and sounds appealing and seems to be a good deal, but is it? I never bothered to read the expiration dates or ask the store manager why this is such a good deal. Thu, 17 Apr 2008 14:47:29 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?2-For-1&id=1109054 http://ezinearticles.com/?2-For-1&id=1109054 I have always enjoyed nature programs and science documentaries on television. There seems to be always something to learn about and something new to explore and wonder. I feel like I am actually benefiting from this rather than becoming brain dead watching soap operas I adore. Wed, 16 Apr 2008 15:43:11 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Another-Day-in-Parasite&id=1107390 http://ezinearticles.com/?Another-Day-in-Parasite&id=1107390 Which is worse, the drug or the disease? These days it seems prescription medications are on a roll for delivering worse symptoms than what they are intended to cure. But that's OK, there are always live human pain reliever overdose studies proving we can dull any pain. Read the sarcastic version of how this all works out for the common good. Yeah good. I'm good. Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:20:36 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Prescription-Descriptions&id=1104121 http://ezinearticles.com/?Prescription-Descriptions&id=1104121 The Fish Channel may, or may not be, part of a 500 channel expansion due to explode on your television screens in the near future. Here are a few more that you might like to see. Tue, 15 Apr 2008 10:03:45 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?8-Unusual-Television-Channels&id=1111788 http://ezinearticles.com/?8-Unusual-Television-Channels&id=1111788 Have you ever wondered how a certain comedy got his/her start? I can guarantee it took a lot of hard work and thankless audiences. They persisted because that's what they wanted in life. They also had to pay their dues with small audiences and unpaid performances. Tue, 15 Apr 2008 08:46:01 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Become-a-Comedian&id=1110182 http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Become-a-Comedian&id=1110182 Today I decided to have a moment of spontaneity with my toddler, which is unusual for me to engage in things I can't spell. Usually I like my spontaneous moments to occur on weekends - not during those precious work hours when I could be sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring. But when Junior asked me for the 147th time if he could do bubbles, I stopped typing, looked up, and much to his surprise and mine said yes, and we ran outside before I could change my mind. Mon, 14 Apr 2008 12:00:16 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Staying-on-the-Funny-Side-of-Spontaneity&id=1104398 http://ezinearticles.com/?Staying-on-the-Funny-Side-of-Spontaneity&id=1104398 If you have every had a day that you just wish you could do over, well I had one of those days and I figured I would share it with the world for a good Laugh, life is too short so laugh long and hard. We will all live longer because of it. Wed, 09 Apr 2008 09:20:29 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?My-Worst-Day-in-Real-Estate&id=1091701 http://ezinearticles.com/?My-Worst-Day-in-Real-Estate&id=1091701 A science test was conducted on adults in different countries. The citizens were asked a simple questions: "How much is 10 x 100 grams?" These are the results... Wed, 09 Apr 2008 08:53:21 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Measure-Cultural-Differences-in-Metric-Units&id=240461 http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Measure-Cultural-Differences-in-Metric-Units&id=240461 In case you missed Google's April Fool's Day fun, don't worry. They'll get you again--they always do. This year's hoax--Project Virgle--offered space buffs the chance to join the first human colony on Mars (2014) and featured an online application, a "test of pioneering potential," and a map of the planned landing site along with convincing burble about the red planet's "mineral goodies that. Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:35:07 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Were-You-Virgled?-Using-Hoaxes-To-Help-Kids-Be-Thinkers&id=1087841 http://ezinearticles.com/?Were-You-Virgled?-Using-Hoaxes-To-Help-Kids-Be-Thinkers&id=1087841 All of us can count on three things in life...taxes; death and of course...those pesky orange traffic barrels! You know...the "orange barrel blues"...as it were! Mon, 07 Apr 2008 15:49:34 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Orange-Barrel-Humor!&id=1093124 http://ezinearticles.com/?Orange-Barrel-Humor!&id=1093124 They tell me it is fun to grow old and become infested with senility, or maybe Alzheimer's disease, in that you are able to meet new friends every day, hear new jokes every day, and so on. That may be true, but I just don't remember. Mon, 07 Apr 2008 15:15:59 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughing-Our-Way-Into-Old-Age&id=1087302 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughing-Our-Way-Into-Old-Age&id=1087302 Another weekly hilarious column about staying on the funny side of weight loss secrets. You'll never look at spam the same way again. Mon, 07 Apr 2008 14:22:31 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Staying-on-The-Funny-Side-of-Weight-Loss-Secrets&id=1076617 http://ezinearticles.com/?Staying-on-The-Funny-Side-of-Weight-Loss-Secrets&id=1076617 I never played sports when I was a kid. I wasn't in little league baseball, pee wee football, and rarely ever picked up a basketball. Sure, I played ball in the street with my friends, but I sucked at it. Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:35:46 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Maybe-I-Shouldve-Learned-to-Catch-the-Typewriter..?&id=1085552 http://ezinearticles.com/?Maybe-I-Shouldve-Learned-to-Catch-the-Typewriter..?&id=1085552 Comedian describes some of the negative aspects about being an unknown, "road comic", one of hundreds of working-stiff comedians traveling the country. Sometimes show business isn't as glitzy as people think it is. Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:29:37 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Who-the-Hell-Wants-to-Live-Like-This?&id=1085511 http://ezinearticles.com/?Who-the-Hell-Wants-to-Live-Like-This?&id=1085511 For those of you who have served, or are awaiting to serve, on jury duty, this is a must read. You may never look at this week long obligation the same again. Fri, 04 Apr 2008 14:23:51 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Jury-Duty-You-Have-the-Right-to-Remain-Comatose&id=1089888 http://ezinearticles.com/?Jury-Duty-You-Have-the-Right-to-Remain-Comatose&id=1089888 When I first came to Taiwan to live I listened to the language and thought to myself, "OK, this doesn't sound so hard. I have high-school French and German so I already possess some linguistic ability. I can learn this. Fri, 04 Apr 2008 12:37:18 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Learning-Chinese-NOT!&id=1084283 http://ezinearticles.com/?Learning-Chinese-NOT!&id=1084283 Late one dark night Lu Lu Bear got fed up with the tenants living in the apartment building across the alley from her lovely urban den. Lu Lu Bear minds her own Peas and Ques, stays within her own property line, doesn't bother her neighbors and expects the same in return. Sometimes that's not enough and she finds herself pushing the border back to where it belongs. Thu, 03 Apr 2008 11:24:55 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Lu-Lu-Bear-Gets-Revenge&id=1080132 http://ezinearticles.com/?Lu-Lu-Bear-Gets-Revenge&id=1080132 The Tucson Deli is where I buy my cheese. The rusty machine in my cellar allows me to slice my meat at home. Stepping up to the counter, I request one pound of white american cheese which makes me sound like a racist. Thu, 03 Apr 2008 09:59:24 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Behold-The-Power-Of-Cheese&id=1079767 http://ezinearticles.com/?Behold-The-Power-Of-Cheese&id=1079767 I worked hard that day, too. I got home late that afternoon to the devastation. He submerged my mailbox in an avalanche of monumental destruction. He closed the walkway I purposefully makeshift to the mailbox with a three and a half foot tall wall of ice and road salted chunks of ... ice rocks. That's what they really are. The driveway was even worse. Wed, 02 Apr 2008 13:35:06 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Wing-Truck&id=1077940 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Wing-Truck&id=1077940 What exactly does it take to be a redneck? Is it a part of your DNA or is it the way you part your hair? Is it a state of mind, or is it the state of Alabama? These are the questions that keep many redneck wanna-be's up all night until the butt crack of dawn. Wed, 02 Apr 2008 11:46:51 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Redneck-How-To-Guide&id=1077551 http://ezinearticles.com/?Redneck-How-To-Guide&id=1077551 Is it a miracle that when I sat down to write this, my intention was to express my frustration in this industry, trying to get an agent to represent me to finally notice me... and before I was done writing my first paragraph, I actually had one say via email... they were interested? I don't know. What are the odds? I don't really believe in miracles. I believe in hard work and ethics paying dividends. Wed, 02 Apr 2008 10:26:47 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?To-Write-or-Not-to-Write-That-is-a-Question!&id=1076610 http://ezinearticles.com/?To-Write-or-Not-to-Write-That-is-a-Question!&id=1076610 After a couple years we decided to sell our beloved log cabin. I met a lovely young lady, fell madly in love, got married, and had a child with her at the ripe young age of 39. Realizing that the cabin was not a great choice to raise an infant and due to the fact that we were so remote, we decided to sell and move north to the Great North Woods of New Hampshire. Where winter is nine months long and the other three months is just bad snowmobiling with black flies. Go figure. Wed, 02 Apr 2008 10:24:41 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?What-Did-I-Ever-Do-To-Old-Man-Winter-and-Mother-Nature?&id=1076555 http://ezinearticles.com/?What-Did-I-Ever-Do-To-Old-Man-Winter-and-Mother-Nature?&id=1076555 Inside my businesswoman body beats the heart of an artist. And sometimes that artiste gets pretty darn uppity, wanting nothing more than to cut up whatever I've been working on. The kids started calling these episodes Diva Moments, and the name stuck. Wed, 02 Apr 2008 10:18:37 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Diva-Moments&id=1075929 http://ezinearticles.com/?Diva-Moments&id=1075929 Is is just me or has anyone else called a place of business ... as in a retail chain of sorts ... or a restaurant ... seeking certain information and you're received with a bombarding 30 second or more greeting script promoting sales that are of no value to you and are unintelligible because the speaker is talking faster than their lips can move? Why are they talking so fast? Because they have a lot to say in their scripted greeting and are most likely embarrassed about the content of the script even though they are employed there. Tue, 01 Apr 2008 16:26:41 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Thank-You-for-Calling&id=1076616 http://ezinearticles.com/?Thank-You-for-Calling&id=1076616 April Fool's Day is a day to make fun and that spirit of fun is usually at it's peak that day. Quipping April Fool's Day jokes and playing pranks on your friends and coworkers are what the celebration is all about. Tue, 01 Apr 2008 16:23:55 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Play-Harmless-April-Fools-Day-Pranks-On-Your-Friends&id=1074645 http://ezinearticles.com/?Play-Harmless-April-Fools-Day-Pranks-On-Your-Friends&id=1074645 There are many ways to tell we are getting older. Some are obvious, some aren't. Here are ten sure fire ways to tell if you've reached that certain plateau in your life. Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:02:16 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Ways-to-Tell-Youre-Getting-Older&id=1075146 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Ways-to-Tell-Youre-Getting-Older&id=1075146 Lorries and lorry drivers are constantly generating quirky news stories, and here are the eight best from all over the world. If you like ridiculous lorry stories, you're going to love this! Mon, 31 Mar 2008 09:31:41 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Worlds-Top-8-Silly-Lorry-Stories&id=1071958 http://ezinearticles.com/?Worlds-Top-8-Silly-Lorry-Stories&id=1071958 The summer of 1980. I had my license for over a year now and had done my best to do what damage I could to Mom's car and even my grandparents' car. This was a malicious act with the intent that if I did enough damage to theirs, they'd consider letting me buy one of my own. Fri, 28 Mar 2008 15:30:50 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Freedom,-The-French,-and-Old-Orchard-Beach&id=1068909 http://ezinearticles.com/?Freedom,-The-French,-and-Old-Orchard-Beach&id=1068909 There are many ways to tell we are getting older. Some are obvious, some aren't. Here are ten sure fire ways to tell if you've reached that certain plateau in your life. Fri, 28 Mar 2008 15:01:16 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Ways-to-Tell-Youre-Getting-Older&id=1075146 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Ways-to-Tell-Youre-Getting-Older&id=1075146 It started out like any ordinary Daddy/Daughter Day. Honestly, I don't know why we bother to call it that anymore since Mommy comes to lunch with us now. Thu, 27 Mar 2008 15:39:45 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Not-So-Fast-Food-Luncheon&id=1067867 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Not-So-Fast-Food-Luncheon&id=1067867 Bug lovers beware. There is a bug assassin on the loose who is like a wolf in sheep's clothing. They are always among us. Is there on living with you? Thu, 27 Mar 2008 11:59:50 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Ninja-Bug-Assassin&id=1066861 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Ninja-Bug-Assassin&id=1066861 It's a catchy title for a story. It reminds me of one of Aesop's Fables where there will be some lesson instilled in young minds who endure reading it. That's probably not going to happen in this tale. Although, somebody might learn something from my mistake. That's only a mere theory with no statistics to back it up whatsoever. Thu, 27 Mar 2008 11:59:25 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Ant-and-the-Coffee-Maker&id=1066820 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Ant-and-the-Coffee-Maker&id=1066820 I woke up the other morning around 4 AM and there was this beautiful young girl in our bed between me and my wife. She was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and she smiled when I opened my eyes and she said... Thu, 27 Mar 2008 11:58:36 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Two-Girls-in-My-Bed-Not-Exactly-a-Fantasy&id=1066773 http://ezinearticles.com/?Two-Girls-in-My-Bed-Not-Exactly-a-Fantasy&id=1066773 Even when you are in a really bad mood and you hear someone else laugh you cannot help but laugh right along with them, even if you don't know them. There is not a better sound out there than someone laughing, truly laughing, and enjoying something that they have seen or heard. Remember the last time you were just flipping through the channels and you heard a funny joke and you started laughing hysterically? Thu, 27 Mar 2008 11:34:30 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Pure-and-Simple-Joys-of-Comedy&id=1066059 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Pure-and-Simple-Joys-of-Comedy&id=1066059 Prospective brides are always getting advice on what to expect from marriage. There are countless magazines dedicated to this topic. Now, for the first time, the prospective groom gets advice on the pitfalls and trip wires of marriage. Tue, 25 Mar 2008 13:39:44 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Advice-For-The-June-Groom&id=1066962 http://ezinearticles.com/?Advice-For-The-June-Groom&id=1066962 Since music is my background and has been since the age of 9 and that I have been a comedian since 1980, I felt it only fitting that I do a Top 10 list of my favorite comedy songs. There have been so many novelty songs on the charts and in movies over the years and I hope I can remember all the ones that I have enjoyed and I will do my best. If I forget any of yours, let me know I and will update my list. I will just go through most of them and then put them in my list. With all that being said, here we go: Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:24:38 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?My-Favorite-Top-10-Comedy-Songs&id=1060891 http://ezinearticles.com/?My-Favorite-Top-10-Comedy-Songs&id=1060891 Stand up comedy is a challenging field to pursue. Here are some tips for that first time on stage. Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:14:17 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Stand-Up-Comedy-Your-First-Time-on-Stage&id=1065532 http://ezinearticles.com/?Stand-Up-Comedy-Your-First-Time-on-Stage&id=1065532 I have a simple solution to life's problems, as far as my physical health is concerned. I don't worry about things I can't spell! This is a skill that is learned; you're not born with it. I have to credit TV with this ability to block out concerns over my health by simply ignoring anything that could show up on the National Spelling Bee. Tue, 25 Mar 2008 08:56:24 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Pharmaceutical-Commercials-and-Auto-Ads-Are-Funny!&id=1065419 http://ezinearticles.com/?Pharmaceutical-Commercials-and-Auto-Ads-Are-Funny!&id=1065419 Do you spend a lot of time with work and other responsibilities that require you to be focused and serious? While it is necessary to focus on some things, you should always make time to have a good laugh and smile, or simply chuckle to yourself. There is no better way to do this than by watching a few very funny videos at the end of the day. There are some very funny videos out there that are just a few seconds in length that will not take much time out of your day, but will definitely add some enjoyment to it. Tue, 25 Mar 2008 08:37:23 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Why-Laughter-Is-So-Important-In-Our-Lives&id=1059962 http://ezinearticles.com/?Why-Laughter-Is-So-Important-In-Our-Lives&id=1059962 When you live in a foreign country you need time to understand the culture. If you focus on the humor part of the culture you can come up with many differences easily. Not only the content part of humor can be different but also the form; what was popular in one culture can become popular in another but many years after. This is like paintings: some countries have shifted their focus to a new modernist style while others still prefer the classical form. The contribution to the songfestival shows that Spain is changing. Mon, 24 Mar 2008 16:24:27 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Spanish-Contribution-to-the-Eurovision-Songfestival&id=1063144 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Spanish-Contribution-to-the-Eurovision-Songfestival&id=1063144 Two days ago, I noticed that my mouth was hanging open and drool was cascading into my cereal. This event caused me to question if my medication dosage was a tiny bit too high. My spit mixing with the oatmeal enraged me enough to smash the bowl in my sink. Mon, 24 Mar 2008 14:10:04 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?How-Do-You-Know-Your-Medication-Level-Is-Correct?&id=1059012 http://ezinearticles.com/?How-Do-You-Know-Your-Medication-Level-Is-Correct?&id=1059012 Some of us cook quietly and without causing a disturbance. Not in this household. Mon, 24 Mar 2008 11:28:54 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Kitchen-Sounds&id=1052602 http://ezinearticles.com/?Kitchen-Sounds&id=1052602 How Hollywood views kitchen renovation projects is quite hilarious. Generally the way that kitchen remodeling projects are portrayed in the movies and on television are as comedies. The reasons are obvious. Mon, 24 Mar 2008 11:07:01 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Kitchen-Remodeling-Humor&id=1061381 http://ezinearticles.com/?Kitchen-Remodeling-Humor&id=1061381 All other kinds of personality aside, this is a novel and very common type discussed here. The inner feelings of a man are described here in light way. Mon, 24 Mar 2008 09:31:36 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Onion-Personality&id=1058182 http://ezinearticles.com/?Onion-Personality&id=1058182 An apron with a funny saying can transform an event from boring and tedious and exciting and fun. It's true! Use this technique to make it happen. Mon, 24 Mar 2008 09:02:37 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Aprons-With-Funny-Sayings&id=1060380 http://ezinearticles.com/?Aprons-With-Funny-Sayings&id=1060380 My hometown of Warrensburg, Missouri, has a population of approximately twenty thousand people, dogs and other critters. It is known far and wide as the home of the University of Central Missouri. Only ten miles to the east is a small town of Knob Noster. Fri, 21 Mar 2008 16:59:10 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?My-Career-As-A-Terrorist&id=1058621 http://ezinearticles.com/?My-Career-As-A-Terrorist&id=1058621 I might just run. If I did, these are my goals. Not your typical fare. Fri, 21 Mar 2008 11:55:12 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?If-I-were-Elected&id=1057085 http://ezinearticles.com/?If-I-were-Elected&id=1057085 My wife cleaned the freezer in our pantry. She threw a bunch of things away. I was surprised to see the bag that sat on rear of the lowest shelf go. Fri, 21 Mar 2008 11:52:15 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Anybody-Seen-Bob?&id=1057070 http://ezinearticles.com/?Anybody-Seen-Bob?&id=1057070 I picked up the ringing phone to be greeted by my seven-year old grandson. "Hi, Grandpa." "Hi, Zak. What's up?" "Do you want to come to my T-ball game on Wednesday?" Fri, 21 Mar 2008 11:51:29 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?T-ball-Shuffle&id=1057057 http://ezinearticles.com/?T-ball-Shuffle&id=1057057 Today I went down town to see if I could get somebody to weld a piece onto my Jeep Commanche. The door jamb lock fell apart and I'm using a bungee cord to secure the door. (It's a really STRONG bungee cord) I didn't realize it was a holiday and some things weren't open so the trip into town appeared pointless. Thu, 20 Mar 2008 15:13:00 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Just-Sit-Back-and-Relax&id=1052119 http://ezinearticles.com/?Just-Sit-Back-and-Relax&id=1052119 Before you know it, summer will be here and there will be a never ending string of pool parties, beach parties and get togethers. Here are 10 ways to tell you may have taken it a bit too far. Wed, 19 Mar 2008 11:31:58 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Ways-To-Tell-If-Youve-Had-Too-Much-To-Drink&id=1056152 http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Ways-To-Tell-If-Youve-Had-Too-Much-To-Drink&id=1056152 Have you ever been on an elevator and just wanted to remove that uncomfortable feeling of silence? Here are five sure fire ways to make your next elevator ride memorable. Wed, 19 Mar 2008 10:44:56 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?5-Fun-Things-To-Do-On-An-Elevator&id=1056105 http://ezinearticles.com/?5-Fun-Things-To-Do-On-An-Elevator&id=1056105 When Alice Weatherspoon fancied a bit of fish for her tea, she didn't go to the fishmonger's or the chip shop, she went down to the river to catch her own. Mind you if the river warden were to catch her fishing without a license it would have cost her a pretty penny, the fines were ridiculous and could be as high as 2,500. It would have been an easy job for Alice to get a license, but she refused too on principle. Tue, 18 Mar 2008 11:33:01 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Tickler&id=1049800 http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Tickler&id=1049800 Some things are funny to some people, other things to other people. Is there a Comedian for all? Tue, 18 Mar 2008 09:57:24 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughter-Is-the-Best-Medicine&id=1041154 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughter-Is-the-Best-Medicine&id=1041154 I put this article under humor because it beats all, it is funny, but only in a logical way, that being, we tell others what to do with killing this and that, and then go home and kill whatever we want in the animal kingdom. It is like complaining about having a fly in your soup, and you get mad at the waitress for it, and go home and eat a dirty camel. Mon, 17 Mar 2008 11:28:15 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Kangaroo-Soup&id=1048645 http://ezinearticles.com/?Kangaroo-Soup&id=1048645 Sometimes women and me forget that they take themselves with them everywhere they go. Style is one thing that stays with us throughout our lives but the funny thing is people forget where they put their style once they leave the house or get out of the car. Mon, 17 Mar 2008 09:26:32 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?I-Have-Style-I-Think&id=1045419 http://ezinearticles.com/?I-Have-Style-I-Think&id=1045419 Some things are funny to some people, other things to other people. Is there a Comedian for all? Fri, 14 Mar 2008 11:52:48 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughter-Is-the-Best-Medicine&id=1041154 http://ezinearticles.com/?Laughter-Is-the-Best-Medicine&id=1041154 I tell you, my oldest daughter is something else. Last summer she would wake up at the crack of dawn and ride her bike to the mall. It was only a short distance away and she would ride with friends so it wasn't so much a safety concern I was having, but rather how uncomfortable I felt about her hanging out at the mall all day and not doing something more constructive with her time. Fri, 14 Mar 2008 11:13:15 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Diamond-Hunting-In-The-Wal-Mart-Parking-Lot&id=1046214 http://ezinearticles.com/?Diamond-Hunting-In-The-Wal-Mart-Parking-Lot&id=1046214 Who knew laughter had so many health benefits? What kinds of humor are there? Thu, 13 Mar 2008 13:23:18 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Taking-Laughter-Seriously!&id=1039447 http://ezinearticles.com/?Taking-Laughter-Seriously!&id=1039447 While focusing on the bald spot at the crown of my bartender's head, I began to review my extensive knowledge on the subject of money. After a brief mental wrestling match, I come up with three things that are absolutely true. 1) Paper currency smells bad if you make the effort to check. Thu, 13 Mar 2008 08:48:12 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Is-Money-Good-Or-Evil?&id=1032965 http://ezinearticles.com/?Is-Money-Good-Or-Evil?&id=1032965 The common new-age wisdom is that we can only think one thought at a time so why not make it a positive one. So why does my brain feel so crowded! Is it truly stuffed with something or rather anything other than the one thing I want to remember? Wed, 12 Mar 2008 15:32:04 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Mindless-In-Miami&id=1036530 http://ezinearticles.com/?Mindless-In-Miami&id=1036530 If Noah had to build the ark in 2006, his story may have gone something like this: And the Lord spoke to Noah and said, "In one year, I am going to make it rain, and the rain shall not stop until it submerges the entire earth and all living flesh is destroyed. Because of this, I want you to save the righteous people and two of every living species on earth. Therefore, I am commanding you to build an Ark." Wed, 12 Mar 2008 12:36:34 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?If-Noah-Had-to-Build-the-Ark-in-2006&id=1031618 http://ezinearticles.com/?If-Noah-Had-to-Build-the-Ark-in-2006&id=1031618 This morning, I heard on the radio about a local man killed by a cow. I live in a rural area, and there's not much of anything here except cows. You don't get the opportunity to hear this kind of news in the big city. Wed, 12 Mar 2008 08:22:17 -0500 http://ezinearticles.com/?Angry-Cows-Get-Revenge&id=1033035 http://ezinearticles.com/?Angry-Cows-Get-Revenge&id=1033035 Copyright 2008 EzineArticles.com - All Rights Reserved.