When does ordinary stress become too much stress or distress? There are a variety of reason children feel stress. Death of a loved one or it could be someone they did not even know, divorce, remarriage, moving, abuse, world crisis; such as the wars, family or community violence, natural disaster, and cultural conflict may heighten stress.

How about the fear of failure, given the increased pressure of standards testing? It is not always obvious, however, when children are feeling overtaxed. Children often have difficulty describing exactly how they feel. Instead of saying "I feel stressed" they may say "my stomach hurts." My son's stomach hurt each time there is an activity he is anxious about. Some children may cry, become aggressive, talk back or become irritable. Others may behave well but become nervous, fearful or panicky.

Stress can affect a child's physical health. Asthma, hay fever, migraine headache and gastrointestinal illness can be brought on by stressful situations.

What can parents do? The most important thing is to begin by monitoring your own stress levels. Frequent conflict in our lives is unsettling for our children. Keep the lines of communication open- Kids feel better about themselves when they have a good relationship with their parents. Encourage friendships-Children who do not have close friendships are at risk of developing stress. Schedule play dates, sleepovers and other fun activities. Keep in mind your child's temperament when scheduling daily activities- you know your child best.

Most importantly-children of all ages need time to relax and play.