We've all had toxic friends and chances are we still have one or two hanging around so tips to survive the attack of the toxic friend are vital to your self-esteem. And your self-esteem is vital to your personal safety, which includes your mental, emotional and physical well-being.

Definition of a Toxic Friend:

The friend part is someone to do things with. The toxic part comes into play when your "friend" dumps her emotional garbage on you or belittles you. Your red flag is that afterward, she feels better and you feel worse. Toxic friends are not really friends at all. They just pacify us (play us) until they, in their attacker mindset, need a power-fix. And there we are ready to take it because we are trying to be a good friend.

How we get toxic friends:

We like to have friends and the toxic ones seem easy to come by. The reason for this is they have burned out their other friends and are always looking for new victims. Yes, that's right - VICTIMS.

Ways to avoid:

1. Use your ears. When you meet a new prospective female friend, listen to what she says. Notice if she speaks poorly of past or present friends. If she does, she'll do the same to you.
2. Notice how you feel about the her. Not just when you're with her but afterward. If you feel weird, something's up. It doesn't matter if it makes sense; this is your gut feeling and may have nothing to do with logic.
3. Keep the relationship "surface" for a good period of time. It shouldn't take long to know if she is toxic but if you plan major outings or get in too deep, extricating yourself after toxicity sets in is more challenging. Toxic people are game players and can make you feel guilty for something they did.

What do do about it:

If you meet someone you feel is a toxic friend in the making, RUN...fast! If you already have a toxic friend you would like to rid yourself of, you'll need to establish and enforce personal boundaries. That is determining what is acceptable to you, what is unacceptable to you and what you will do, both verbally and physically when someone crosses the line.

Knowing how to avoid the toxic friend is an important safety tip for women since toxicity weakens us and other attackers look for weakness when selecting their victims.