Most people are not going to choose suffering consciously. Suffering is a choice, but that choice can be made on an unconscious level or from a lack of awareness and thus the choice goes unrealized. The problem though lies more so in that most people just don't know how to get rid of the distress they feel.

Suffering comes from the addition of something into our life that is not desired, or the loss (or withholding) of the something that we did desire. Thus, either way we are clinging to something (or an idea) we either perceive should not be in our life, or is in our life.  Suffering cannot be relieved until that clinging stops. In other words, we need to let go. But that is easy to say - not to cling and to let go, but what does it mean? How do we actually use that ease suffering? How is it implemented?

Clinging comes from labeling something as part of our identity. When anything enters our life that threatens that identity we experience some form of suffering - this could be physical or emotional. Thus in order to alleviate suffering you need to strip away the illusion that you are the things you have labeled as your identity.

That label, when you say "I am a better person because of this 'such and such' a thing," is clinging. Or you say "I am less of a person of this flaw, weakness, or deficiency, etc" is also clinging.

If you ask someone who they are, likely they will name off where they work, how many kids they have, social circles, who they know, if they are married, how long they have been married, how much money they make, and the list goes on and on. These are the things that are used to describe who that person thinks they are as an individual. All these things are temporary or can change in a moment, and suffering then occurs. We feel loss, we feel overwhelmed, we feel helpless.

By letting go, we start to realize that these things are not us. A career, a marriage, money, a house, a car, our popularity should not define us. We can enjoy them and partake of them in life, and should, but they are not Us (capital U). These are things outside of ourselves. These are roles we can simply play in life, but we are much bigger than that.

In order to cease suffering we must realize that we are everything and in all life there is duality, relativity, and thus suffering. Suffering stops when we reach the point where we realize that the only thing which is not duality is oneness, the indivisible, and we accept it. Oneness is exactly that, you are one with absolutely everything. Every person or object is a symbolic mirror which allows you to see yourself in others, and allows others, if they have some clarity, to see themselves in you. We need to see ourselves in everything - that we are all connected - and our experiences are part of connectedness. By trying to divide or separate ourselves from certain experiences we will experience a perpetual cycle of pain.  Instead we must accept what has happened, accept that it is part of the world and thus part of us and by accepting we immediately move forward. Through this process the fear and identification of certain aspects of the world melt away, and our suffering diminishes.

At this point in your life the concepts discussed may seem like philosophical mumbo jumbo, and if that is the case it is OK. Even just making a few changes in thinking can erase much suffering from your life. Realize You (capital Y symbolizing the broader context) are not the things that are causing your suffering, these things are simply roles you have played.  You can accept them for what they are, and let them go.

Growth only comes from suffering if you are able to accept it is happening and thus move on from it.