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Why Do Many Relationships Die?
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It does not matter how badly the marriage may be going at the moment or how broken the relationship between the two people may be at the moment. The point is that there are times when two people who knew happy moment or moments may turn to find out that happiness is far from them. There must have been a time also when the two people entertained the idea that they could make it out to be good husband and wife. Let each love story end up as it may, the fact is: "beginning is always sweet". The trouble is that the sweet portion of relationship may be over before the marriage, and the parties enter into the marriage because they do not want to hurt each other, rather because they are still enjoying the relationship.

Why do many relationships die? I think there are number of reasons. I shall briefly look at some of those reasons and suggest remedies. The first main reason is the fact that most relationship start outside the will of God. The parties involved have sinned and rebelled against God. When people live outside God's will the relationship that was meant to satisfy will turn to pain.With God at the centre of the relationship will last.The relationships fail is when self is ruling either one party or both. So two sinners who continue in their sin and rebellion against their maker will fail in their relationship. If a man whom God have made the head of the family fails in his responsibility to honor and respect God, everything under him will also rebel against his government.

The second reason is the wrong parties are married to each other. A man whose shoe size is 9 will have a bad time with an excellent size 7 shoe.

The third reason why relationships fail is mistaking emotional fever for love. Emotional fever comes on and off when mistaking for love and getting married on the basis of these feelings always brings problems at the end of the day. The ironic part of this fever is that when it is over the parties concerned will find out that there was no love on which they have built the relationship. There is a great difference between lust and love. Fire of lust doesn't last long but with test of time love endures. People should not get into marriage relationship because of beauty. Beauty will not last for forever.

The fourth reason is that the love is allowed to die. Love is in sense living. If love is well nourished, it will grow and multiply. If badly fed it becomes dwarfish. If starved or poisoned, it dies from the starvation or poison. So to stay in love, things that poisons love must be eliminated and the things that causes love to grow must be brought in.

The following poisons and kills love:

1. -Harsh words
2. -Cruel actions
3. -Selfish attitudes
4. -Excessive demands
5. -Superficiality
6. -Dishonesty
7. -Lying
8. -Marital unfaithfulness
9. -Dirt and disorder
10. -Ugliness
11. -Gossip
12. -Coldness
13. -Foreign interference from relatives
14. -Spiritual backsliding
15. -Poor communication
16. -Separation from each other
17. -Pride
18. -Exposure of the faults of the partners to others
19. -Extravagance
20. -Lack of a clear sense of direction
21. -Poor leaderships from the husband
22. -Lack of submission from the wife.
23. -Laziness
24. -Financial security (the best security is that with God as the Guarantor).

the following causes love to grow:

1 -Tender words
2 -Tender and understanding actions
3 -A selfless attitude
4 -Generosity
5 -Hospitality
6- Humility
7 - Openness (No hide and seek)

Can the death of a relationship be avoided? Of course, yes. If only and if we can take serious thought on the above, heaven will be our limit of joy and peace. Marriage is made to be enjoyed and not to be endured. That marriage has no reason to die. That marriage has no reason to go into divorce if you are willing to play honest part.

By the grace of God a minister of the Gospel who loves to see the family stays together in harmony. Sharing family problem goes along way bringing in solution.

http://www.solutionsformarriageproblems.blogspot.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Nicholas_Anyanwu

Nicholas Anyanwu - EzineArticles Expert Author

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Article Submitted On: October 28, 2008



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