One day a small girl heard her father talking to her mother:

“Darling, I have to go out to dinner tonight with my clients. I don’t really like to but I feel obliged.”

The small girl asked her father, “What is obliged?”

The father answered, “Well, it means that you have an obligation. It is when you don’t feel like doing something, but you can’t easily avoid it.”

The small girl nodded her head even though she didn’t really understand. The next morning after breakfast she packed her school bag and waved goodbye to her mother and said, “See you Mum, I am going to my obligation.”

This is reality and very common in the modern world. In our daily activity like our jobs or any duties, very often we would actually prefer to avoid. These obligations take up more and more of our time. We always wish to be somewhere else but feel powerless to change them. Often we hear people complain:

“If I didn’t have to go to work, I would like to be able to sleep in the morning and wake up late or if it wasn’t for these examinations, I would go out to a party with my friends or if I didn’t have to worry about putting on weight, I could eat more chocolate or if I didn’t need his help, I would not have to treat him so nicely….”

Our actions cannot be sincere when we do things out of obligations. Acting from a sense of obligation, we lose our respect and integrity. We have different behavior at home and in public. Politicians and lawyers are famous examples. How many can be sincere? It is very difficult for spiritual practitioner to be politician or lawyer. A person might be dressed in fine style on the outside but we do not know what is actually inside his mind. People can seem happy when in fact they are deeply hurt. Outwardly they have to comply with the rules and regulations but inwardly they may be longing to escape and be free from them.

When we look carefully, it is actually made up of two elements, selfish desires and greed for material gains. Even though our conscience is crying out and our true nature is struggling to keep our feet on the path of truth, they are overcome by the temptation to gain material advantages and increased prestige. A life lived only for such gain is essentially meaningless. It seems beautiful on the outside but it is empty within. The wise man said,

“A person who lacks sincerity is no more real than a paper doll. A person who is not flexible, understanding and gracious is like a wooden statue. A person like this will encounter obstacles wherever he goes.”

Saints and Sages are sincere in their lives, while worldly people surround themselves with superficiality. The reason for this is that the actions of saints and sages have their roots in righteousness whereas the motives of ordinary people are based on selfish desires. When we see carefully on how ordinary people live their lives, the first concern is self interest. They would not do it if there is no personal gain. The last of all, they may consider doing something simply because it is the right thing to do.

Most people in the world, even though they work hard all their lives, their rewards at the end are no more than illusions. Worse still, because of the insincerity and falseness, such lives have serious karmic repercussions. Without sincerity, there is no master. Without a master, selfish desires run wild and the pursuit of personal gain overrides all other considerations. A person under such circumstances has no true direction and can only drift along like the passing wind or current.

Lao Zi once said,

“Saints do not deviate from Zi Zhong.”

“Zi Zhong” means the crux or the crucial point. During ancient times, when armies moved from place to place, the food and other supplies were carried in carts known as “Zi.” They were always very heavy laden and so they were described as “Zhong,” which means heavy. Since they carried all the food, weaponry and medical supplies, these carts were crucial for the survival of the armies. Lao Zi used the term “Zi Zhong” to emphasize the critical importance of the virtues of Tao in our lives. We depend on the essence of Tao just as the armies depended on their carts.

Mencius said, “I desire to live and I desire righteousness. If you ever have to choose between them, forsake your life for the sake of righteousness.”

This statement conveys an unwavering sense of purpose and not the superficial concerns that occupy us when we act out of sense of obligation. In the words of Confucius, “A virtuous person’s attitude to all circumstances in the world is beyond subjectivity. His mind is not set for or against anything. He will do what is righteous and appropriate.”

Author: T.A Chew