Relationship breakups aren't fun for anybody, in fact they can be devastating! Let's get back to the basics here. What do most of us want in life? A healthy relationship with someone that can love us for who we are and always be here for us. Often times when we're in a relationship we think we "have it", and get so accustomed to being with that person that when things end our world comes crashing down.

Going through a breakup is terrible, many have compared it to the loss of a family member or death. The death of someone you care about is very much the same as the death of a relationship. We don't want to lose the relationships that we value so dearly. There are things that can be done to get a relationship back even after a terrible breakup.

Nobody can say that breakups are forever. I know people that have made it through some really rough times, especially bad breakups, to come out of it as a stronger couple. It takes effort to salvage a relationship, that's why most breakups never get resolved - they weren't willing to put the time into fixing things.

There are different kinds of breakups. If you've had a few relationships in your life these will probably look familiar, as most of us have suffered through a few of them. You need a strategy to fix a relationship, don't just go into things without plan and hope it works out, it won't. Different breakups require different techniques to fix them.

Abusive Relationship

If your relationship ended because of physical/emotional/mental abuse it's best to leave it where it's at, trust me. Staying with someone that abused you is like spending your days with a ticking time bomb, how far are you going to go before it blows up? Being abused in any way destroys peoples self-esteem and their sense of self worth, not to mention the obvious physical and emotional scars that can be left behind. There is nothing you can do that will guarantee you won't be abused again, it's not reasonable to expect an abuser to change.

Mutual Breakup

The breakups that occurred because both people wanted out may be more difficult to fix than other kinds. Usually when both people agree to go their separate ways they're ready to move on, or at least closer to moving on than a couple where one person dumped the other. If both people have moved on into different relationships, or into living the single life there isn't much you can do to bring the other person back.

They Broke Up with You

Oh yeah, this is the worst kind of breakup. The reason being is that you're the one that's hurt the most here. Nobody can ever feel this exact pain quite like you do. But the good thing is that now that you have some time to yourself sit down and figure out why the relationship ended. What was it that caused the two of you to break up? Once you've figured it out ask yourself if this is a relationship you want to save, can you fix the problems and make it viable for the future? If this is something that you can and want to do that's great! You're already half-way there, the hardest part is done.

You Broke Up with Them

Sometimes it takes a little bit longer than we'd like to realize what we want in life. In thinking that we're doing what's best for us sometimes we do the opposite. Breaking up with someone just to realize you miss them and don't want to be without them can be devastating. Don't panic though, there is help out there. You two had strong feelings for each other at one time or another so get back to those good feelings. The very first thing you're going to have to work on is yourself, and getting your ex to re-establish trust in you. You already broke this person's heart once, they don't wan to get dumped again.

Any time that you decide to get back into a relationship it's a new start. You're going to have to let go of all the bad things that plagued the relationship before, because you probably don't want to go through another breakup. Starting slow is the key to rebuilding trust. Having fun together and in general just spending time together strengthens the bond.