We know the cliche; only tall, well built guys with power, self-confidence and oodles of money win the girl. Sure, we notice them. But if they lack the things below, they are eye candy only. For all you other guys out there, take heart and discover what really matters.

Intensity

Women love intensity. About anything; the changing color of leaves in autumn or your collection of crystal figurines, so be intense about something. Start with your job. If you work with pumps, point out the importance of pumps, the thrill of turning an ailing smoke-belching pump into a purring symphony of perfectly aligned moving parts, the critical role they play in industry, and how they affect the lives of everyone. Be intense and she will either inform the authorities or go out on a date with you.

No complaining

Limit whining, complaining and negative talk. It depresses and drives people away. Much more appealing are being positive and certain.

Listen

There are two kinds of listening: the bad kind and the good kind. The bad kind is where you want her to hurry up and finish with her story so you can jump in and tell yours. Most guys are good at this.

The good kind of listening is where you really hear her. Women love this. But there is an art to listening. You cannot nod off or watch people walking past; you need to look deep into her eyes (not her lips nor chest), lean forward slightly, nod and when she pauses or stops, make encouraging comments like, "And what else?" or "So what did you do?" Stay involved.

Humor

Comedy is an aphrodisiac, and women would much rather go out with a funny nerd than a boring hunk. Make her laugh, even about stupid things. But note, rattling off penis jokes to a girl you have just met, does not qualify. If you feel comedy is not your forte, become funny. Material surrounds you. Slight self-deprecation works well, as long as you are fine with the flaw, for example, your clumsiness. If you have a major hangup about it or if you berate yourself excessively, she will label you a loser. Also ensure you are the butt of any joke, not her.

Tender and gentle

Women love it when a guy cares if she breaks a nail or her dog is sick. She likes it when you go shopping with her or help her cook. Balance these gentle acts with manly ones, and you are a winner.

Be a gentleman

Being well-mannered, like holding the door open and pulling her chair out for her, are clinchers.

Genuinely love women

Not lust, as in after Scarlet Johansson. Everyone knows women smell good and feel better, but what about their allure, their mystical and contradictory nature, both frustrating, yet intriguing. Love the very nature of womankind.

A touch of vulnerability

Women like a take-charge kind of guy who sorts everything out and makes their lives run smoothly. But they also love a touch of vulnerability. Maybe a slightly rumpled look, your shoelaces untied or a speck of shaving cream on your chin. Avoid making it your trademark though -- "Here comes the guy with shaving cream on his chin," makes you look foolish.

Be clean

Take a bath or shower before you go out. Rumpled clothes or uncombed hair is fine, but body odor and bad breath are immediate turn-offs.

Keep your opening line simple

"Hi, my name is Michael," said with a smile, "May I join you?" is a great opening.

Conclusion

If you are an intense, vulnerable, funny well-mannered guy who showers and cultivates his feminine side, listens well, loves the whole spectrum of women, yet is still single; ease up. Wearing the perfect trainers and killer cologne is trying too hard. Relax, take it back a notch and happy dating.