To Forgive and Be Forgiven

Making up feels sweetest when you know you are forgiven. Surprisingly, the virtue to forgive is seldom present in many relationships. This is because forgiveness is often misconstrued as an act that condones and tolerates misdeeds.

The fact is, it is a wrong perception. Forgiveness simply means that we allow ourselves to accept that which we cannot change, allows us to become free from the bondage of resentment and other complicated emotions, it allows us to show our love for another. In this guide, I will provide steps on how you can experience the magic of making up through forgiveness.

1. The first step to forgiving your partner is to get out all that you are frustrated over. In many cases, it is best to first write out how you feel. You should do it in such a way that only you see what you write. Write down every detail, every emotion, and vent every bit of anger that you are able to. Once you get it out, you will feel better. Then, you can take the highlights, or the more serious issues, and figure out a way to contend with them. From here, you may need someone other than your partner that you can vent to. This could be a professional, or it could be a higher power, such as God. The choice is yours, but it is a step that should be engaged in.

2. Analyze the problem objectively. Once you've composed yourself, find out how your words or actions contributed to the conflict. Chances are that no matter how minute they were, your actions were indeed partly responsible for the problem. Don't let your partner get all the blame.

3. Once you have figured out what role you played in the events that transpired in your relationship, it is time to write down a plan of action. You should determine what it is that you can do in order to successfully make up your portion of wrong doing. You should consider what actions that you can take in order to make your partner happy. Remember; never compromise your values or beliefs. However, if you are in the wrong, it is essential that you make amends for it.

4. Pause, retrace your steps and ask yourself again, Am I still angry? If your answer is yes, repeat steps 1 to 3. Analyze the cause of your anger. Know with whom and why you are still being resentful. Remind yourself that you cannot move forward if you're unwilling to forgive. If your answer is no, congratulate yourself. You're ready to proceed.

5. Request an audience with your partner. Explain the cause of your frustrations, but don't make your speech sound accusing and provocative. Instead, temper it with a healthy dose of sincerity and tact, owe up to your mistake and beg for forgiveness.

Forgiving yourself and the person you love can be a daily habit that will help you ride securely through the ups and downs of a relationship. Hold on to this habit and let go of your anger and resentment. This guide has already shown you that the journey to giving and receiving forgiveness is not that difficult to take.

Liz Johnson writes articles on relationship forgiveness [http://magicof-makingup.com/wordpress/]. If you have found this article helpful you may find a related article Picking Myself Back Up [http://magicof-makingup.com/wordpress/?p=95].