The Polarity in Our Lives - How to Find the Control

There is polarity in our lives, the world and the universe. Everything has an opposite. This is the rule of existence. The two opposites are an aspect of the same thing; they are not separate or distinct. Think of hot and cold. There is no one place where hot becomes cold; they are just varying gradations of two states blending into one another. Up and down, fast and slow, motion and rest, west and east, north and south, truth and error, belief and disbelief - all of these are examples of two opposing poles or ideas. If we travel west, we eventually reach the east. Going north, we pass the North Pole and head south. Love and hate represent two sides of an emotional scale, moving from intense love to a lessening of love until a dislike turns to an increasing hatred.

Opposites are just varying degrees of the same thing. There is polarity in the world, our lives, our activities, our emotions.

Poise is Power

The challenge is to find our center between two extremes. "Poise is power" is how this balance is described. I love that statement. Poise results from balance. Think of a seesaw as an analogy. Riding this childhood joy provides highs and lows. Many of us seem to find our seesaw lives as exciting, but too much energy is required for the ups and downs. Balance is where our power resides; that is the "poise of power."

Walking on a seesaw, we seem to climb until we reach the center where we can keep the plank level from the highs and lows. One step out of that equilibrium, we go down from a previous up. Moderation should be the goal, even though we often rebel against this concept because it sounds too boring. We tend to quest for edges, not realizing they come with an equal and opposite reaction. Our power is not in the ends but in the equilibrium.

Think about how our lives might be different if they were less like a seesaw and more calm while we sit in the middle. Might that eliminate some problems we create in our lives?

Chaos and Order

Chaos and order are another example of extremes. Chaos is not always bad, and order is not always good. Balance is the key.

What if we understood that chaos was natural and necessary in our lives? What if we accepted that order was not always desirable? Would that help some days?

The heart beats in a steady or orderly fashion. An irregular beat means trouble. We cannot survive without this order. The brain, however, has a chaotic pattern. This is the opposite of how the heart behaves. Within our bodies, chaos and order thrive.

We usually try to quell any disruption in our daily routine. If that happened in our brain, the result would be disastrous. If chaos and order coexist in our bodies, can they coexist in our lives?

If we accept that everything is connected, we can let our bodies teach us something about our larger world. Chaos and order in our bodies reflect a larger scale in life. The world mirrors our dichotomy.

Perhaps that awareness can help when we are feeling stressed. Our challenge is to balance the chaos we have with the order we desire. Both are natural; neither can be avoided. The analogy of riding a bicycle helps explain this dynamic balance of constantly shifting weight and attention from chaos to order and back again.

Power is Within

The power is within us, not external to us. In the center, we find ourselves. The control we think we strive for is not rule over others, but command over ourselves. When we can achieve balance in our lives, we have sway over activities, decisions, and emotions. That is power. That is poise.

Think of all the words that the dictionary uses as synonyms for the word "power," such as "authority," "control," "supremacy," "rule," "command," "clout," "muscle," and "force." How often are these words in the headlines? How often are these words used to describe too many of the on-going conflicts in the world? Yet all the attention is external. If all is connected, perhaps our attention should also be focused within to find a balance. Could we achieve a greater calm in the world if we understood our own internal balance between two extremes? Without internal poise, there is less chance of stability in the world. Everything has an opposite.

We have control in our lives and in the world. That power is in our balance.

Cheryl A. Chatfield, Ph.D. invites you to visit her nonprofit organization at http://NottInstitute.org to download Do It Yourself Guide To Spirituality: Seven Simple Steps. Learn universal guidelines to help our spiritual quest. This material is an excerpt from that work.