In our society we do not talk openly about miscarriage. It is a loss that is normally only shared between close family members and friends. There appears to be a shame associated with the loss. Women can feel responsible, incapable of creating life. The struggles that a woman can go through as a result of miscarriage are vast. That struggle can often depend on how women and others around them view miscarriage, as a personal failure or a common difficulty that many women face.
It is time that we bring this taboo topic out of its closet. Miscarriage is such a common problem that women face and we need to start an open dialogue to make sure that, if it happens to us, we do not feel isolated and alone, inadequate and broken.
Repairing ourselves emotionally after a miscarriage requires a different amount of time for each individual woman. A complete abortion/miscarriage can be a very traumatic event that takes place quickly, leaving a woman with little time for contemplation until after the event has taken place. It is also important to note that some of these processes can take days and sometimes weeks to get through, leading to an entirely different set of emotional requirements. With a missed miscarriage, for example, the woman may choose to wait until the body naturally rejects the fetus instead of choosing medical intervention. Within a specific time frame, up to 6 weeks past fetal death, this is an acceptable path to take but this means that a woman may carry a dead fetus for up to 6 weeks. Often these women are still experiencing all of the normal signs of pregnancy (morning sickness, weight gain, etc.) because the gestational sack is still attached to the uterus during this period thus tricking the body into thinking that it is still pregnant. You can imagine the emotional effects that this process might have on a woman. Powerful and sometimes quite overwhelming.
I consider myself a relatively educated woman when it comes to pregnancy and birth. I am involved with birth as a profession for pete's sake but I had never really paid attention to miscarriage. As a doula it is all about preparing women for the birth of a full term (hopefully) baby. I was quite guilty of ignoring the topic of miscarriage. I know many women who have experienced miscarriage in my personal and professional life. Looking back I feel ashamed that I did not know more about what they were experiencing at the time. I should have known...for them, for myself...you live, you learn I suppose. In fact, I knew nothing about any other form of miscarriage than the complete miscarriage. It wasn't until talking to friends and experiencing a miscarriage myself (and it was certainly not the complete kind) that I started learning about all of the different kinds of miscarriage AND the statistics surrounding miscarriage.
I now feel quite passionately that all women should understand miscarriage before getting pregnant. It should be talked about openly so that women who experience miscarriage do not feel a moment of fear. As with the process of giving birth, women who are educated and prepared for their birth experience will often report a more positive birth experience due to a higher understanding of their bodies natural processes. I am not suggesting that it is possible to be prepared for the emotional aspects of miscarriage, that would be completely impossible yet perhaps women could be prepared for the physical experience. Just as the full term birth process follows a natural process, so too does a miscarriage.
This article is for entertainment purposes only and is not medical advice. Please seek the advice of a medical professional if you experience a miscarriage.
© Annie Scott
Annie Scott is a Doula and Childbirth Educator.
She is also the founder of Tummy 2 Mummy, an online magazine devoted to Pregnancy, Birth, Breastfeeding and Parenting. http://www.tummy2mummy.ca
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Annie_Scott
