Traditionally our society has valued people who are book smart, who have high levels of IQ. However new emergent thinking now proposes an alternative intelligence. Simply put it is about being people smart, and if one is to be smart about people who is the most important person to be smart about. Yes, you! This article is about the concept of emotional intelligence and how developing your emotional intelligence can help you become a better leader.

According to Daniel Goleman who popularized the notion of emotional intelligence 80% of one's success in life is determined more by your EQ rather than your IQ.

So what does it mean to be emotionally intelligent and how does it make you a better leader.

Goleman identified 5 categories of emotional intelligence which are:

Self awareness

Self management

Motivating oneself

Social awareness and

Relationship management

Self awareness is about recognizing and acknowledging your feelings and emotions as it happens. In a society where rationality is prized over emotions that can be quite hard to achieve. In a sense it is about being a neutral, non judgmental observer of own feelings and emotions. Are you always aware of the moment when you are feeling angry or happy or energized? Being self aware means noticing these emotions as it happens so not snapping at someone and then asking yourself ' Why did I snap at that person? 'Actually it wasn't about them at all, I was feeling irritable before they spoke to me.

You can probably guess what self management is then about. It is about recognizing what lies behind a feeling and learning ways to handle it. So if you are feeling irritable what is causing that irritability and more importantly what can you do about it. Self management is also about personal responsibility and following through on your commitments.

Motivating one's self is about mastering your emotions in the service of a goal; it is about creativity and also delayed gratification. I have to say that is one I struggle with. When I go to a restaurant and the bread basket is brought round I can easily find myself falling into an almost trance like state where I will consume more and more bread. The instant gratification I get from eating bread is hard to withstand. However if my goal is to be an ideal healthy weight for my age and height this is a circumstance in which the emotionally intelligent response would be to practice delayed gratification. I'm thankful to be able to say now that when I go to restaurants my friends take the bread basket away from me!

Do you ever walk into a room or an office where there is a group of people and think there is something wrong with that person. They don't seem to be themselves. Do you walk up to them and say 'Are you alright?' That is the fourth component of EI being socially aware, being tuned in to the emotions and feelings of others. It is about the ability to empathize. The key to knowing other peoples emotions is the ability to pick up on non verbal language such as facial expressions and one's tone of voice.

Relationship management is about people skills. It is about the ability to organize groups of people. It is about the ability to prevent conflicts or resolve those that flare up. It is about being able to build relationships with people and get along with others.

So how does being emotionally intelligent relate to leadership?

The most successful leaders have a clear sense of direction and purpose. They are motivated and really good at practicing delayed gratification in order to reach their goals. The most successful leaders are usually described as a people's person. They get on well with others; they bring people from all walks of life together to achieve a common purpose. Leaders, who are empathetic and care about the feelings of others, will naturally have followers.

However before you can lead others it is important that you can lead yourself. It is important that you know yourself, you recognize and manage your own emotions and that you yourself are motivated.

Nana Sekyiamah 2007: Leadership Trainer/Coach