People find friends as their ultimate keeper of secrets and shareholders of fun. Their presence makes every dark gloomy days seem brighter and makes every warm sunny morning lighter than ever. There was even this finding that having friends can be a sure antidote to illnesses and depression providing a 22 percent lower risk of dying early. However, what if a so-called friend is actually a frenemy? Does that count?

It was something coined from the movie "Mean Girls": a friend/enemy. Some people find this as something new to their hearing but as new as it is, its tale has been said many times over.

What is a frenemy?

She's your friend, then again, maybe not? It's a love-hate relationship really. You're close yet competition is on the role. They may range from the manipulative to the selfish and unkind. There is besting each other at anything from the latest fashion find to the boys that you love and hate. They take your every failure as a success and your every success a challenge. If you feel a friend falls into this category then do a background check on your friendship meter.

Know your frenemy...

It may be hurtful but it's for the best. There are times we need to pay attention to our instincts as we try to see the real ones from the fake ones. Determining this may help us be at bay from potential crabs that may pull us down any moment and at the same time may still keep that friendship from getting into a more unhealthy turf (that is if you want to save it). Spotting these frenemies, however, can be something that may surprise you.

Most frenemies are actually persons who share your interests. In this case separating them from the genuine friends is a challenge. They may talk against you behind your back; compares everything from your stuff to accomplishments with theirs; and would always want something better than what you have. These are just some, so to speak, but there are more ways to spot someone who has this tendency. However, if a friend has a different taste than yours then determining is made easier.

As there are ways that may spot the different friend from the midst, there are also things that we should be aware of.

There are persons who happen to be insensitive and may seem to be someone that may bring you down. This doesn't necessarily qualify her as a frenemy. But if a person continuously uses your friendship for her personal agenda: manipulates, breaks promises, ignores requests and so on-then she is definitely one. These are actually friendship errors that go below the limit.

To really decipher the frenemy, comparing her with someone whom you think is a true friend is a good way to start. Weighing may actually let you see the difference from how you are treated and taken as a person. If you can't then there's always that one trustee friend that can help you distinguish. This friend should be from someone outside so as not to have a biased judgment.

Things may seem tough at times but true friends are those who rise you up by encouraging and by marking your mistakes so as to give way for your growth. Know your frenemy; they are people who have envy that eats them up.

Keep your friends close, and your frenemies? Sometimes closer...