Platinum Author
Many shy and unconfident people enter new situations wondering what the people they are meeting are going to make of them. If they go to an interview they go there with the attitude that 'whatever you want me to be that is what I will be'. When they enter new relationships they take this malleable attitude with them, 'who do you want me to be so that I can be accepted by you?' But this of course is the wrong first impression and has a long lasting effect because you will never be able to live up to other people's expectations of you.
In an experiment some cardboards were held up to participants with lines of varying length drawn on them. Some of the participants in the group were plants and the others had no idea. They were all asked questions about the length of lines and the plants chose the wrong answers on purpose. The other people influenced by the plants in the group altered their correct answers to match the incorrect plants answers, even though they knew that the answers they were giving were incorrect.
This shows you that with a little influence you too can make people change their minds. Rather than enter a room with an apologetic air seeking how you should alter yourself to accommodate someone else, enter with confidence saying via your smart dress and proud demeanour, 'this is who I am! Pretty good huh?'
Don't get me wrong, it is not that you should not address any changes to your skills or presentation that are needed for a particular job, but you cannot let it dilute who you are. That all becomes too confusing for you later on and I have yet to see a time when this approach has helped the person feel good about themselves in the long run. Of course it helps if you know who you really are in the first place...
About this Author
Do you need help with your self confidence? The best help is usually to introduce into your life people who will fully support you and bring out only the best in you and suppress the learned rubbish like self doubt, low self esteem and lack of confidence.
One of those people could be me! I'm up for it! - Are you? Pop round to my online home at coachrosie.com and soak up clear advice, tips, free products and short films on self confidence, esteem and being the you you want to be. LETS DO THIS!
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