How to let go of the familiar things in your life that you used to cling to because of fear that they might be blown away.

The uncertainty in our lives causes many of us to keep things in our lives that we really do not need anymore. It is "just in case" thinking. We are so convinced that one day we might need them, even if we know that one day has long been gone. The future represents unknown territory to us. The majority of us seem to think that the unknown is a synonym to some kind of threat or at least something negative. Change is a challenge and we tend to change only if pain or pleasure is involved. Things CAN also get better!

When my husband died, I did not want to throw away anything that belonged to him because I wanted to keep him in my life even if I had no need for his personal items. I became very clingy. His clothes were kept in our house and I would challenge anyone who even suggested that I could give his clothes away since he certainly would not need them anymore. But I could not. All his personal items had a story to tell and I wanted to keep that story alive as long as possible. I was afraid that my memories of him might be blown away if I got rid of his possessions.

Obviously my mind changed rapidly when I learnt that had been three of us in our marriage. My sorrow became anger and I soon found time to give away his personal items to the local charities. My main motive was, that by doing so, I might be back on my two feet faster and able to move on in my life.

Out of sight and out of mind is a motto which helps some people in their clutter cleaning. Others remind themselves that in order to have space for something new, the old items simply have to go. This is quite often true in our physical world when we think about storage space. But we change mentally too. I found it liberating simply owing fewer things than before.

Nowadays I remind myself that actually I do not own anything. There are things in my life that keep and look after, but when my time is up, they will be passed on to someone else. I now understand that no matter how much I tried to hold on to something, I am unable to bring anything with me on my last trip. And quite honestly I do not remember anyone trying to take away the memories I still have. It is true to say, that owning less has altered my life. But it has not destroyed the love I once felt towards a person I choose to marry. And memories seem to be disaster-proof. No Northern wind has blown them away.