Bullies have been around as long as children. Today's bullies are expanding their role to keep up with the ever-changing requirements of the 21st Century's digital cyber world. So in essence, nothing has changed about bullies except the way in which they execute their dominance over their victims.
Bullies of today have incorporated the traditional abusive strong-arm qualities of yesterday's bullies with modern technology of cyberspace, which includes social networking sites like FaceBook and Twitter, email, cell phones and other types of digital technology. These modern digital intimidators of the cyber world have emerged as a new generation of bullies known as "Cyber Bullies".
What Is Cyber Bullying?
Cyber bullying is one of the fastest growing problems facing school administrators and local governments around the country, and since most of these students are using social network sites like Facebook, as one of their primary sources of communication, cyber bullying has become somewhat of a dilemma.
The definition of cyber-bullying is when the Internet, cell phones and other devices are used to send or post text or images intended to hurt or embarrass another person. It is a situation in which a child, most often in their teen years are repeatedly tormented, threatened, harassed, humiliated, embarrassed or otherwise are targeted by another child or teenager, using text messaging, email, instant messaging or any other type of digital technology.
Lauren Newby, a Dallas, Texas high school sophomore was the subject of malicious postings of a thread on a web site message board that was started by a former student at the school she attended. The postings made fun of Lauren's weight saying, "People don't like you because you are a suicidal cow who can't stop eating." There was also mention of Lauren's struggle with Multiple Sclerosis saying, "I guess I'll have to wait until you kill yourself which I hope is not long from now, or I'll have to wait until your disease (M.S) kills you." As a result of theses vicious postings, Lauren's car was egged, the words "MOO BITCH" were written in shaving cream on the sidewalk in front of her house, and a bottle filled with acid was thrown at her front door.
What Should You Do?
There are two methods that have proven to be effective in the fight against cyber bullying. One method involves the use of a technical tool such as surveillance software like iMonitorPC which is available at http://www.iMonitorPC.com that can help concerned parents fight the growing threat of cyber bullying. Installing surveillance software on your children's computer will record their text and keystrokes. The use of such software is intrusive and your children will most definitely label you as a spy, but it is about as close as you can get to physically standing over your children's shoulder while they are online.
The second method involves the application of good parental guidance as well as administering good sound practical advice to your children. Keep in mind that parental guidance works well with young children but it can become a challenge in teen aged children because of the temptation to rebel that is often presented by their peers. Giving good advice often works with teens, especially if you have developed a good parent/child relationship with your teen.
You can teach your children to defeat cyber bullying by remembering the NASS rule:
Never give out personal information
In the hands of a cyber bully passwords, photographs, a home address or a private phone number can become a weapon of intimidation. For example, if your Facebook password were to be compromised a cyber bully could lock you out of your own account and even post false postings about others leading them to believe that you were the culprit.
Be selective about what type of photographs that you post on the Internet because once it goes into cyberspace it is anyone's guess where it will end up. You would be surprised as to what a little work in Photoshop can do to manipulate a photograph, making it appear to be what it is not.
Always resist
If you are the victim of cyber bullying you should not retaliate by fighting the bully with bullying. However, you should make every effort to resist cyber bullying by reporting the actions of the bully to the appropriate authority. For example, if you have been victimized through your email inform your Internet Service Provider (ISP).
If you do not allow a cyber bully to use you to torment and embarrass others, cyber bullying will end quickly.
Stop responding to the cyber bully
When someone sends you a threatening message you may feel a strong urge to reply with a message of your own - don't! Cyber bullies expect you to reply and when you do, they know that they have you worried and upset. It is a form of mental terrorism that all cyber bullies use to cause fear to dominate you.
Save any suspected emails or text messages
If you suspect that you have become a victim of a cyber bully you should save your email and text messages; if the situation escalates you may need them later as evidence.
In addition to implementing the NASS rule, if you are a victim of cyber bullying you should immediately go to an adult whom you trust and report the situation before it gets out of hand. Never give up; keep reporting your situation until you find someone who is willing to help you.
However, if you are threatened with bodily harm, do not hesitate to dial 911 and report the situation to the police immediately.
About this Author
Eric Dunbar is the owner and editor of Golden Entrepreneur [http://www.goldenentrepreneur.biz], where you will find outstanding resources to help the online entrepreneur excel in business. Eric Dunbar is also the author of THE FACE OF A DEMON, referred to by many as "The Recovering Addict's Handbook", and editor of X-JOURNAL Blog [http://www.blog.ericdunbar.com]
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