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How to Be a Good Dad and Great Husband
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Introducing a new baby into a marriage is always a challenge. Some couples have a romanticized view of having a child and feel that if they are deliriously happy and in love, a baby will only ratchet up the level of love in the household. Then they are shocked to realize that bringing a baby home can turn a relationship that's perfectly peaceful into a stressful situation.

Gone will be the days where you and your wife will jet off on a vacation on a whim. You can't just run out to a romantic restaurant for dinner, and you can't exactly drag baby in a carrier to a dance club or bar. So, lots of spontaneous aspects of the relationship naturally end.

Next, all that dispensable cash you previously had to buy your wife jewelry or yourself a flat screen TV is now going to buying diapers, formula and other baby essentials. You can't begin to imagine what baby gear costs, and your infant will need many of these things for years to come. Let's not even talk about saving for college, or for a wedding if you have a daughter.

Being a great dad goes hand in hand with being a good husband. You pretty much can't have one without the other. You don't ever want to experience the day where your child grows up and tells you that you were a fun father, but a lousy husband to his mother.

Here's some advice to help a new dad be a winner at both the jobs of husband and dad:

1. Keep the Original Couple Unit in Tact: Don't kick your relationship to the curb just because this new little being has come into the picture and needs you for everything. Remember that a baby should join your relationship, it shouldn't overtake it. Find ways to make personal time with your wife and maintain a strong marriage by putting it first. Let family members baby-sit for you for a few hours so that you can spend time with your wife alone.

2. Be Helpful: Inevitably, the onus of caring for the baby will fall on your wife--especially at the beginning. She'll be the one carrying the baby while pregnant, she'll be the one going through labor and if she's breastfeeding, she'll be the one to feed exclusively for a good while. As your wife is spending sleepless nights caring for your newborn baby, your job should be to care for her. Help her cook, clean, change diapers and run errands. You'll be the household rock star for it.

3. Show Affection Often: If your child sees that you are loving and caring toward your wife, you are imprinting a behavior that will determine the success of their future relationships as adults. A boy that sees his father being loving toward his mother will grow up to be a great husband himself. Equally, a daughter will seek out men in her life that she will hold up to the standard of love that she got from her dad.

4. Form a Team with Your Wife: Make sure you and your wife discuss how you will raise your children and come to an agreement on how you will discipline them. Don't undercut your wife or battle it out in front of the kids if you disagree with a particular parenting tactic. Your child needs to see that mom and dad are a united front when it comes to how things should work in the household.

5. Smile and Bond Early: You work all day and come home and you're exhausted, but your kids will be waiting breathlessly for you to walk through the door to play. Put on a big happy smile so that they know that you are super thrilled to see them. Nothing makes a kid light up like seeing a big grin on dad's face--if they see you are happy, they will be happy. Make a big effort to spend time with your kids outside of your home, and take them with you when you go out to the store or make a run to the library. Connect with them closely when they are little, as it's hard to start a bond with them once they are older.

6. Don't be a Jerk: Kids don't have a great attention span and will often get themselves into trouble doing downright silly things which can be exhausting and cause you to lose patience. Don't put adult expectations on a small child, and allow for them to screw up and be zany without being overly hard on them. Make sure you recognize their limitations and don't taunt your child by calling them a "cry baby" or a "sissy." Kids remember these labels for a lifetime and it just serves to belittle them and lose confidence. Your greatest achievement as a dad should be to help your child learn from mistakes, and grow up to be a self-assured adult.

Published by Lisa Freeman from My Baby Clothes Boutique, an online boutique that offers boutique hair bows, baby boys hats and much more.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Lisa_Freeman

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Article Submitted On: November 05, 2009



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