I remember a long time ago reading a book by Shad Helmstetter called "What To Say When You Talk To Yourself". I was mesmerized by the idea that one of the most important stumbling blocks to my success in any endeavor was based in the words that bounced around on a minute-by-minute basis in the 6 inches between my ears.
As Mr. Helmstetter points out, we are inadvertently programmed from our first days in the negative. In fact, if we grow up in a fairly average, reasonably positive household, we are told no, you can't do that, or some version of the same over 148,000 times by the time we reach adulthood!
When one looks back on their own childhood and compares that with the number of times that they were told positive affirmations, or what they could achieve in life, the number are drastically smaller. Maybe 100, or 1,000?
And it's not your parents fault. Most of the negative messages come from people who are trying to protect us from what they see as potential physical or emotional harm. Telling Johnny "No!" as he's about to put his hands against the hot stove is anything but the wrong response for a caring parent. It's just that we continually get these course corrections from caring parents, siblings, teachers, friends, and the 6 o'clock evening news. The negative pressure just continues to mount up.
The result is our second-guessing our own actions, questioning whether people will like us because of our looks or our interests, and our often irrational fear of rejection if we step out of line with what the "average" people around us do. It's a battle royale in the gray matter inside our skulls.
The solution is knowing how to control these naturally occurring success torpedoes by overcoming them with positive messages. Writing positive affirmations about yourself and reciting them might feel weird, but it really does work. Once you tell yourself the positive aspects about yourself enough, and recite the goals and dreams that you have in the past tense as if you have already achieved them, you will start to unconsciously believe them and the keys to the castle will be handed down to you.
We're all looking for the secret. If we could just find that silver bullet that would deliver our greatest accomplishment. If we just knew the one thing that set all of those over-achievers to their goals and dreams, we'd be on our way. Well, you have the single most important secret that is shared by every winner in every industry or sport.
Belief in yourself and what you CAN accomplish trumps all.
About this Author
Referral Marketing expert Mikel Erdman has x-ray vision for understanding the missed opportunities that exist in every company, and the creativity to convert them into gold! If you're looking for a simple, quick and easy way to boost sales and generate referrals without wasting countless hours online, get your FREE Referral Marketing Nuggets now at http://www.mikelerdman.com
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