All relationships have a breaking point; what you do with it determines whether you grow together or grow apart.  Knowing what caused the rift can help you when getting back your ex.  Actually learning from this experience can make your relationship stronger and prevent further rifts.

The cause of a relationship problem may not be a specific event, but the effect of an underlying problem that's been going on for quite awhile.  You may need to look deeply at yourself to know if you gave just as equally as your partner in your relationship.  Where you or your partner neglectful or disrespectful?  Those behaviors have to change to fix things, and you both have to want to change.

If a specific event caused the breakup, you'll need to look beyond your anger and find out what caused it to happen.  Someone may have cheated because they were feeling neglected.  Someone may have been staying out all night because the other person wasn't giving them enough of their time.  Whatever it was, take the time to look deeply into these events if you really want to reconcile.

Sometimes, no matter what you do, it is a futile attempt in getting back your ex.  Your ex may not be willing to resolve any issues.  You ex may not feel the same way about you, and they may never have.  If this is the case, it's best just to deal with the breakup and move on.  This can be very painful, but learn to use it as a growing experience.

Most relationships die because of the actions of both people involved.  There may have been a specific event that led to the dissolution, but if you look closely, you can almost always see a pattern leading up to the event that helped cause it.