Flirting Advice - Why Your Mindset Matters

Mindset plays an important part in flirting. With the right kind of mindset a positive response is almost guaranteed and with the wrong kind of mindset, you are doomed to fail right from the outset.

Now, everybody knows that confidence plays an important part in all forms of communication, including flirting. In this article, I want to focus on a different aspect of mindset however. What I want to focus on is your value mindset. In your mind, what value do you assign to your self and what value do you assign to your partner?

The big mistake many men make when they approach women is that in their minds, there is a huge discrepancy in value between themselves and their partners.

On the one hand, you have the typical shy guy who's been hesitating much too long before he finally approaches a girl and has placed her on some kind of a pedestal. To him, she is an almost angelic being and he's already decided that she's out of his league. Obviously, this puts him in a very bad position for creating any kind of attraction.

On the other hand, there is the typical "macho jerk" who's probably very drunk before he ever approaches a woman and sees her as very inferior. The "jerk" usually doesn't have the courage to approach (and risk rejection from) someone he truly respects. Because of this, he needs to devalue his partner in his mind before he can initiate contact. Again, this is a pretty bad basis for building genuine attraction (although I have to admit that the jerk's cards are better than the shy guy's).

In a nutshell, you don't want to come across as submissive and meek but neither do you want to come across as a careless idiot.

So, what's the ideal mindset? Ideally, you should initiate flirting with a woman with the mindset of: "I wonder if she's interesting?"

This mindset prevents you from feeling completely inferior to her, makes sure that you will get her to qualify herself to you (a very important attraction factor) and at the same time it implies that she might be very interesting and engaging (i.e. prevents you from being disrespectful and disinterested).

Of course, your mindset cannot simply be changed like a light switch, but if you quietly ask yourself "I wonder if she's interesting?" as you're approaching someone, that might help in giving you a psychological bump in the right direction. In fact, you should try having a few conversations with that question in mind and see what happens...

Want more information on how to approach, attract, intrigue and seduce women? Learn How to Flirt With Women has all the answers for you.